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Friday, May 27, 2011

Anyone on Facebook you never want to run into?

Yes, I know that was not a very grammatically correct headline (if the newspapers can get away with it, why can't I?) and I apologize to the one follower I have at the moment but read me out. I have been extremely busy this week as my BFF flew down from L.A. to see me for a couple of days (two days of gambling and not going to bed before dawn has made me a not-so-happy-camper). I then only had three days to prepare The Hook Up: Book Two but it was done and posted on Smashwords, Pubit (B&N) and Amazon this afternoon by me. I also worked on the paperback version as well on CreateSpace.

All of this has to be put into perspective as I am leaving on a month-long vacation to France on Sunday to see friends and I still haven't packed. I haven't left my computer all day (except for quick errands that couldn't be helped). I am working insanely long hours between the book and promotion. I try my best to write on this blog at least twice per week (that has suffered this week and for that, I apologize) and I also have a full time life outside my work as an author (who doesn't so no excuses being made).

I have spoken about my divorce (albeit briefly) because it had to do with my books. I changed my name and resubmitted all my work in both my maiden and divorced last names because this series is merely a transition. When I begin the Pop Stars novella series, Benson will be long gone and I will no longer use this hideous name which carries nothing but bad memories for me.

Okay, so what does this have to do with what I was talking about and my headline? A fellow blogger is getting a divorce from her husband (for her own privacy, I will not share her name and unless you follow her blog, you would have no idea). I thought I was pretty much over mine now that it has been more than a year. I would like to believe I am a strong woman; independent and very capable of moving on. In a way I have. I don't date (at the moment) but that is merely because my professional life (divided between university and my more-than-full-time job as a writer and author) keep me very busy. That's not to say there isn't someone special in my life or who could be special but it's only to say at this time in my life, I am merely donating all my time and energy to my schooling and writing. I am living vicariously through my art, so to speak!

So, I sign on to Facebook yesterday and up pops the "People You Might Know" button or whatever it says and there he is. The one person I would rather not see ever again. If I could have lived my whole life and never laid eyes on him, I would have been one happy camper. But no. He's there mocking me, arm-in-arm with a trashy bleach-blonde who looks like an Eastern European prostitute who hasn't escaped white slavery yet (my apologies to Eastern European prostitutes in white slavery; you're probably better looking and much nicer people too!).

He is listed under a different name of course. I always knew he didn't use the name we had as our married name and our marriage was complicated and an absolute mess. I won't say much more than that as I feel like I have preserved his identity even if I have probably massacred my own. I know I sound petty and mean and probably just a spiteful witch who is just jealous. I'm all of those things but most of all, I am hurt. Hurt that I still feel anything for this human being. Hurt that he can still hurt me. Hurt because I am ashamed to admit my feelings to my family but I can tell the whole world literally in cyberspace.

Okay, the pity party is over. Please forgive me but as I am a writer, I'm allowed to be temperamental (Henry Miller and Ernest Hemingway are my heroes).

Without further ado, I unleash the cover of The Hook Up: Book Two of The Beautiful People series now available on Smashwords: http://www.smashwords.com/books/view/62547. It should be available on Kindle and B&N tomorrow.

Enjoy and I will definitely update before I leave for France and while I am vacationing there too. I will be spending some much beloved time between Versailles (yes, it has a famous chateau but it is also a suburb home to over 100,000 people; some of which are my friends) and Paris. Have a wonderful weekend and a lovely evening.

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